Saturday, February 28, 2009

Suddenly Single

My faith in God has helped me make the transition from marriage to becoming single. I am an independent, focused and purpose drive woman. However it took me some time to get to this place. Don’t miss understand me about my bold statement, do I miss being married? Yes but I’ve learned that I can survive and take care of what God has appointed me to do.

Independent and self sufficient because of Christ sufficiency, “Not that we are sufficient of our own selves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God”

(II Cor 3:5 NKJV)

Focused because for so many years wondering in the wilderness with out any purpose or plan and absolutely no idea where God was leading me. My direction in life has been revealed; I live life purposively without barriers, limits and boundaries. I live life with a cause by allowing what God has put in me to flow to those who choose to drink from this vessel.

I can go anywhere God tells me to go, do anything He tell me to do without having to give account of my comings and goings to anyone, except Him. He is my source of whom I depend on for everything. The opportunities are vast, with out restraints from the responsibilities of a relationship and family ties. The ties that bind me now are the ties that bind me to God.

I was thrust into singlehood after a 23 year marriage failed. Thrust into a world unprepared for me and I for it. Facing loneliness, fear, doubt and anxiety awaited me every day. Was I having a bad dream or was it true that my life was headed for a 360 degree turn, a turn in which I was clueless how to maneuver because I was not in control.

One more negative thought, one more set back, one more court date, one more confrontation; I would have lost my sanity. Was I back on the block of availability?

Bombarded with question after question that would cross my mind; where would I go, what would I do, who would love me again? How will I survive?

Somehow by the grace of God, I crawled my way through the fear, doubt and anxiety, like the women with the issue of blood. Fighting against all odds and keeping my eyes straight ahead as Christ was beckoning me to come. Step by step I began to see the light shine on my darkness.

By faith I choose not to listen to the naysayers, the mockers, my haters’ voices that told me I would never make it and even the taunting of the enemy in me.

By faith I was determined to push my self even when I wanted to collapse from the pressure. I stand poised with dignity as the triumphant woman of God.

Those that thought I couldn’t well I’m hear to say I can. Those that laid a trap for me to fall and stumble, well I did fall, I fell forward. Forward to embrace, move and live the greatest life that Christ has prepared for me.

Hold your head up rise above your circumstances and soar like the eagles. Shake off the shame, the humiliation, and the embarrassment, wipe away the tears because your faith in God will propel you to achieve and advance beyond your wildest hopes, imagination and dreams.

The words “I made it” echo in my spirit constantly. I survived when all odds were stacked up against me and faced with insurmountable circumstances, the God in me rose to face every challenge with determination, resilience and vigor.

I encourage you by my own personal testimony that better days are ahead.

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us. Glory to God in the church! Glory to God in the Messiah, in Jesus! Glory down all the generations! Glory through all millennia! Oh, yes!

(Ephesians 3:20 Message)

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